Sometimes the local news is the best you read all day. I love the fact that the council refuses to “look into it” – fuck me I’d be the same, you don’t know where you might end up!
Via The Argus:
Council bosses have been left mystified after reports that a portal to another dimension has opened in a residential street in Brighton.
A member of the public reported to Brighton and Hove City Council that the “wormhole or vortex” had opened up in Montreal Road, Hanover, on May 2.
They made the report via the website Fix My Street which is more typically used to report potholes, dumped rubbish and broken lampposts.
The anonymous poster said: “I was recently walking my affenpinscher (a toy breed of dog) around the Hanover area of Brighton when I noticed that a wormhole or vortex has opened up on Montreal Road.
“On closer inspection it seems to be some kind of portal to other times, places and dimensions.
“I would have investigated further but I was concerned my little dog would be sucked into it.
“Is this meant to be there? At first I believed it might be part of the Brighton Festival but I believe it could be a hazard to the general public. I look forward to your response.”
They followed this up with a report on Thursday, explaining: “The other day I reported the presence of some kind of wormhole or vortex on Montreal Road.
“I went past the other day and it seems to have got worse – it is now emitting an unsettling yellow light and a large snake appears to be emerging from the wall.“I am concerned this is a passage to another time or dimension, and if this snake is anything to go by, I’m worried what else may emerge from the wormhole. Can anyone suggest a course of action to take?”
Brighton and Hove City Council told The Argus they will not be investigating the report.
Commenting on Fix My Street previously, the council said: “We welcome reports through any means residents choose and as a council provide many ways through which residents can raise issues directly ranging from post, online or by telephone.”